I’m not even 50 yet
.. and I’m becoming extremely pissed off with teenagers.
Last Halloween, Wendy called me from the car to say that yobs had run out in front of her and chucked an egg at the car. She reversed to see who it was and called me. Whilst on the phone, they threw another one – both splattered on the car. Emily got scared and started crying so Wendy drove around the corner and waited for me. It only took me 40 seconds.
When I got there, the 30 lads and girlfriends were still huddled at the corner so after reassuring Emily, and being deaf to Wendy’s “don’t chase them” I ran full pelt at the 30. Amazingly, they crapped themselves and made for the depths of Conquer Lane. Mind you, I was dressed in black shoes, black trousers and a black military looking T shirt – so maybe a fat bloke from the SAS had just turned up? It didn’t take me long to find one hiding in a hedge. He had cracked a twig underfoot. I questioned him and asked who the ringleaders were. On hearing that he didn’t know, I “nicked” him by grabbing his anorak at the chest area and pulling him towards me.
“You’re f*cking nicked mate”! I heard myself saying to him, “no please, please, please” he wibbled. The smell of more crap emitted as he followed my arm, reluctantly stuck to his chest area as I strode down conquer lane, dragging him along, shouting obscenities at a bigger crowd of yobs, now formed 500 meters down conquer lane. I delivered the wobbling mess of a mate at their feet and demanded to know who it was. Of course, they didn’t know and some 15 year old made his way forward, taking charge and using intimidation tactics. I held my ground and shut him up, along with the girl who started giggling, “What’s funny honey”? I had made my point though, if you yob around, eventually some crazy bloke will come and murder you – and my goodness, you could see in their eyes that they knew I was one screw from being very loose!
What do you do?
